3 Things to Do to Keep Marriage Strong After Kids

3 Things to Do to Keep Your Marriage Strong After Kids

You’re ready to take on the world with your new arrival.  You have your tiny bundle tucked in his car seat, and you and your husband begin the drive home from the hospital. You’re exhilarated to start living your new normal; you’re also a bit scared about how your life will change.  And change it will, but you’re ready for it.  Or so you think.

One aspect of your new reality that is often not talked about is the effect your baby will have on your marriage.  Often as new moms, we’re thrust into the world of everything newborn.  We handle it as best we can, with a mix of grace, tears, messy diapers, and stolen moments of rest.  And just when we think we’ve gotten the hang of things, we open our eyes, look around and realize other relationships may have started to suffer. Namely, one of the most important ones- Marriage.

If you find yourself in this position, where you barely recognize your relationship anymore or when you just can’t seem to connect with your spouse or talk about anything other than your baby’s adorable face when he poops, it’s time to RE-focus on this cornerstone relationship.  Here are three ideas to strengthen your marriage after you become parents.

1. Pray for your marriage.

You will not find a more powerful tool for strengthening your marriage than prayer. There is something unexplainable that happens when you petition the heavens for your marriage.  It positions your heart right where it should be.  I believe God honors prayer because He desires us to come to Him with all of the moments of our lives, big and small.  Be specific in your prayers about your marriage.  Ask God to bless your spouse and turn his heart toward you.  Ask God to give you moments to connect each day.

2. Make Date Night a priority! 

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a work in progress on this one, but I never regret making time to go on dates with my husband.  Seriously, there are so many options out there, you have no excuse for skipping this one (preaching to myself here).  Need some inspiration?  Check out this cool book for some fun ideas.  Need childcare?  See if you can swap childcare with a friend.  One night, you keep her kids so she can go on her own date night; the next time, she keeps yours so you can have one.

3.  Serve your spouse. 

This may not be the most popular tip, but I guarantee it will strengthen your relationship if you try it out.  You can get creative with this.  Is there a task that your husband hates doing, but does faithfully anyway?  Beat him to it, but don’t tell him!  When he goes to do the unpleasant task, he’ll be in for quite a surprise when he realizes it’s already done.  It can be as simple as taking out the trash or folding his clean laundry and putting it away for him.  When you find little ways to bless your spouse unexpectedly, don’t be surprised that it naturally brings you closer as a couple.

There is no reason your marriage has to suffer after you have children.  You just have to make it a priority and tend to it!  What are your favorite ways to look after your marriage?  Leave me a comment below.

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