Finding Your Tribe {Part 2}

Get Out There! Finding Your Tribe Part 2

If you’ve ever felt like you could use some friends as an adult, this post is for you!  This is Part 2 out of 5 in my series on Finding Your Tribe.

Did you miss Part 1? Check it out here.

The whole idea for this series grew out of my curiosity of wondering if other adults struggled to form deep friendships.  I feel like it was much easier to do when I was younger, but is that because I was more outgoing in my childhood or some other reason I’ve yet to discover?  I posted a question about forming adult friendships on Facebook and the comments were so numerous, I knew I needed to write a series on the responses.

One common denominator I found from the comments on my Facebook post was that people who were seeking to form friendships actually took initiative to get out and seek them.

I know, it’s mind-blowing, right?

I guess the point I’m trying to make is that it’s going to take a little more effort than it did in grade school to make some friends as a grownup.

With the advent of the internet today, it’s all too easy to join a few groups on social media, leave a few comments on someone’s post that you admire, and mistake that for the beginnings of a deep relationship. Unfortunately, that’s not usually the outcome.

One commenter put it this way:

An important quality to have is the willingness to put yourself out there and be the type of person people would want to be friends with in the first place.

In other words, it’s not enough to desire to form deep friendships.  Most of the time, you have to make a focused effort to get out there and actively seek those friendships.

Another commenter on my Facebook post listed four different activities she intentionally got out of the house and participated in, primarily because she enjoyed those activities in the first place and secondly, they helped her meet new people in her new town.

So, if you’re hoping to form some new friendships, I challenge you to take a look at the calendar this week and find something to do in your community that interests you.  It could be as simple as heading to the farmer’s market on the weekend or trying out a local coffee shop you’ve never been to.  Then when you get to that place, here’s where it gets real: I dare you to strike up a conversation with someone.  Be the first one to speak up.

Am I expecting you to become best buds with the person you converse with?  Absolutely not!  But, the very act of speaking up first can help you get out of your comfort zone and will hopefully spur you to strike up another conversation at a different time.  Think of it as great practice for the potential friend you are trying to become.

The second part of this challenge is to think of one person you consider an acquaintance and reach out to them this week.  Ask them if they’d like to set up a play date with your children or try out the new pizza shop or just grab a quick coffee.  The goal is to move them from the “acquaintance” category to a “friend” category.

Who knows what may come of your simple act of boldness when it comes to forming new friendships.

Get Out There…And see what happens!

Look for Finding Your Tribe {Part 3} coming soon:)